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“Modern Alarms”, East Grinstead: faded optimism

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“Modern Alarms” burglar alarm, East Grinstead • This week I’m looking at what I think of as Modernist burglar alarms: those with an unusual rigour of form and branding. They are few in number, and seem mainly to have been bespoke designs for big companies. They also tend to be old, with minimalist design styles recalling the 1970s – before the sloppy post-modernism of the 1980s kicked in, and before purist geometrical boxes were supplanted by fiddly plastic faceting. So where else to start but with Modern Alarms, whose superb name and logo date from the mid-1970s, when the firm’s boss, the late Dennis Smith, had it rebranded from Modern Automatic Alarms. It is housed in the classic Eurobell “coke cap” case, designed by Colin Marsh for the Middlesex-based company Scantronic, who specialised in mid- to high-end security equipment (thanks to Richard Wilson for that info). Modern Alarms went on to use a variety of other cases, but they were always of simple form, solid yellow, and with the logo unchanged and well-placed. There are plenty of examples still to be found around London (and doubtless elsewhere), but Modern they are no more: most are sadly faded and effaced, often resulting in wonderful architectural compositions lent a rueful irony by the sunny optimism of that now-decaying name. • Spotted: High Street, East Grinstead, West Sussex, RH19, England, 2004 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Sussex Mid




“ADT”, Derby: hexagons and tax barons

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“ADT” burglar alarm, Derby • I’ve just emerged from a bout of research on my selection of “Modernist” alarm boxes – Modern, ADT, Thorn, Chubb, Capstan, Lander, Shorrock, Yale – and my head is spinning. I’d chosen them purely on design grounds, but with the exception of Capstan, they form a mind-boggling web of company takeovers, at least proving my theory that these stylish designs were created for the big boys. Security is a serious business, and this is globalism in action: the major firms are like a bunch of ever-larger Pac-Men chomping each other up from the 1900s to the present day, merging, PLC-ing and reverse-takeovering along the way, and led by figures including an emigrée philanthropist, a millionaire professor, a tax-dodging Baron, and a Croesus-salaried CEO currently in jail. Grandaddy of them all is ADT, an American firm formed in 1874, when a bunch of telegraph delivery firms incorporated as the American District Telegraph Company. By the 1960s they were a huge public concern, already operating in Britain, and in 1984 they were taken over by the Hawley Group, an acquisition vehicle run by business mogul Michael Ashcroft – aka controversial Baron Ashcroft of Belize, who was treasurer of the Conservative party while being non-domiciled in Britain and paying no UK tax. He renamed the company ADT Security Systems, registered it in tax haven Bermuda, and in 1997 sold it on to globalcorp Tyco (who make undersea cables and the like), via a reverse-takeover which gave Tyco Bermudan tax status too. At this point Tyco absorbed Modern Alarms and Thorn, and the all-conquering ADT we see here was born. Ashcroft bowed out, and in stepped CEO Leonard Kozlowski, who after trousering $81m in dodgy bonuses – some of which he allegedly spent on $6,000 shower curtains and an ice-sculpture of Michelangelo’s David pissing vodka – ended up in jail from 2005 till 2022. I’m sure that nowadays everyone at Tyco and ADT is lovely and kind, and doesn’t evade tax or have weeing ice-sculptures. But that’s not what I’m really interested in: before I started learning all this, all I cared about was the yellow hexagonal box. So, to get back to the important stuff, it was designed by Colin Marsh for Modern Alarms to replace the round Eurobell featured yesterday, and taken on by ADT when they bought up Modern. ADT have used this so-called “nut” ever since, and they now have branches in over 50 countries, millions of customers, revenues in the billions, and – apparently – a 45 year contract to maintain the security of the British and American governments (expires 2034, so ex-CEO Len will be out of chokey by then). I don’t know who Colin Marsh is, but he’s obviously a talented designer: it would be nice to think he was getting a royalty for each of his ubiquitous yellow boxes. But given the lack of justice in the world – even the burglar alarm world – he probably isn’t. • Spotted: Town centre, Derby, Derbyshire, DE1, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Derby South



“Capstan”, Kensington: not the evil cigarettes

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“Capstan” burglar alarm, Kensington and Chelsea • Because of their clinical 1970s-style design and a name recalling the fiendish hand-blackening Capstan Navy Cut Full Strength cigarettes still common in that era, I’ve always assumed these were quite old. The shield-shaped box also looks like the product of an earlier, more rigorous era; it’s a design classic, but not widely used nowadays except by Banham. I was surprised, therefore, to discover that this firm is very much still in existence, and indeed has its HQ not far from my home. Unlike all the other outfits sporting “Modernist” designs, Capstan seems not (yet) to have been involved in a web of global takeovers; but it’s still a long-established firm, founded in 1978, which may be when the design dates from too. Its restrained colour blocks are reminiscent of Swiss graphics, the sort of livery found on the pill packets Damien Hirst loves to use. He loves using cigarettes too, bringing me neatly back to Capstan Navy Cut – which, befitting their nautical branding, were notorious as the most tar-laden tabs on the market. These unfiltered beauties were once advertised to harassed mums thus: “When the kids are getting out of hand and driving you insane – Relax! Relax! Relax! Relax! Let Capstan take the strain!” • Spotted: Gloucester Road, Kensington and Chelsea, London, SW7, England, 2005 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Kensington



“Future”, Bath: timely

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Future Security Systems

“Future Security Systems” burglar alarm, Bath • So endeth two years of burglar alarms. But blub ye not (in the unlikely event that you were), because – amazingly, heroically, certifiably – I have at least another year’s-worth to publish, though I won’t always be writing “pithy” comments as in the past. And to usher in the new year, 2013′s first theme is “Time”, which I shall kick off with the, um, futuristic Future. Why? Well, 2013 sounds like a science fiction year, and also there’s a big publishing company called Future based in Bath, where I found this sounder. So here’s to the future. Cheers! • Spotted: Margaret’s Buildings, Bath, Avon, BA1, England, 2011 • Politics: In the Liberal Democrat constituency of Bath


“Avant Garde”, Islington: advance guard

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Avant Garde

“Avant Garde” burglar alarm, Islington • Originally French for “advance guard”, these days avant garde means being somewhat ahead of the times. Generally the term refers to artists, but I don’t see why burglar alarms shouldn’t be included too. • Spotted: Caledonian Road, Islington, London, N1, England, 2012 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Islington South and Finsbury


Wormald Security, Islington: Dickensian

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Wormald CentralSt Islington EC1 DSCN3462_800

“Wormald Security” burglar alarm, Islington • And when you’re fishing, you need a worm. Or a Wormald. What a wonderful Dickensian name! And a great 1970s-style modernist monogram, as well. • Spotted: Central Street, Islington, London, EC1, England, 2013 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Islington South and Finsbury

Modern Alarms, Camden: algae

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Modern Alarms

“Modern Alarms” burglar alarm, Camden • As you can see, I’m posting a run of these clear-capped Eurobells at the moment. Not only does this have the logo both above and below the lid, there’s a circuit board and an algae farm sandwiched between them, which is somewhat distracting. • Spotted: Frognal Way, Camden, London, NW3, England, 2012 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Hampstead and Kilburn

Shorrock, Bristol: mossy

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“Shorrock” burglar alarm, Bristol • And here’s the final, rather mossy,  incarnation of the “tupperware” box, as a Shorrock. You still see quite a few of these around, so I’m surprised it’s the first time I’ve published one. I’m not clear how this box type transferred from Securicor to Shorrocks – I’m sure the latter company didn’t buy the former – so perhaps someone can enlighten me. • Spotted: Christmas Street, Bristol, Avon, BS1, England, 2013 • Politics: In the Liberal Democrat constituency of Bristol West

Shorrock


Philips Home Security Alarm, Old Coulsdon: villa

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“Philips Home Security Alarm” burglar alarm, Old Coulsdon • Funny how towns with “Old” in their name are such fertile ground for old alarms. This, situated on a typical Surrey half-timbered villa, seems a very rare one – it’s the only example I’ve ever come across. And in such good condition! It was found very close, I might add, to the Blitz alarm which originally sparked my interest in documenting burglar alarms (oh, folly). • Spotted: Placehouse Lane, Old Coulsdon, Surrey, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Croydon South

Philips Home Security Alarm

AFA Minerva EMI, Tower Hamlets, E2, 2007

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“AFA Minerva EMI” burglar alarm, Tower Hamlets • I take it this is still the original deep metal drum, as it looks exactly like yesterday’s box, but now multi-branded. These Minerva ones tend to stay bright red; either they used better paint than plain old AFA, or they’re just much newer. • Spotted: Cambridge Heath Road, Tower Hamlets, London, E2, England, 2007 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Bethnal Green and Bow

AFA Minerva EMI

AFA Minerva EMI, Govan, Glasgow, 2010

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“AFA Minerva EMI” burglar alarm, Glasgow • Could this be the shallower “Mk 2″ metal drum, ie lighter red and fitted flush with the wall? It was found on the magnificent superannuated shipbuilding HQ at Govan, and matches beautifully those huge red Scottish sandstone building blocks (which always make English bricks look so weedy). • Spotted: Govan Road, Glasgow, Lanarkshire, G51, Scotland, 2010 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Glasgow South West

AFA Minerva EMI

AFA Minerva EMI

AFA Minerva Thorn EMI, Bath, 2012

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“AFA Minerva Thorn EMI” burglar alarm, Bath • Maximum name-ology on what I take to be a plastic drum box and therefore possibly early 1980s. An unusual find because normally the dark panel is blank. Major moss/lichen problems, these West Country boxes. • Spotted: Saracen Street, Bath, Avon, BA1, England, 2012 • Politics: In the Liberal Democrat constituency of Bath

AFA Minerva Thorn EMI

Thorn Security, City of London, EC2, 2011

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“Thorn Security” burglar alarm, City of London • This looks like an original deep drum, but it’s branded simply Thorn Security, which suggests it was updated in the late 1980s or eatly 1990s. Look at the magnificent building it’s on – it’s a  Moorish-style Victorian ex-Turkish baths in the City of London, now re-imagined (unimaginatively) as a very expensive and badly-reviewed nightclub. • Spotted: Bishopsgate Churchyard, City of London, London, EC2, England, 2011 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Cities of London and Westminster

Thorn Security

Thorn Security

Thorn, Tower Hamlets, E1, 2010

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“Thorn” burglar alarm, Tower Hamlets • Plastic box, simply branded Thorn, which RCB suggests is early 1990s. • Spotted: Goulston Street, Tower Hamlets, London, E1, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Bethnal Green and Bow

Thorn

Capstan Security, Barnet, N20, 2011

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“Capstan Security” burglar alarm, Barnet • There’s always something rather military-looking about these Capstans, with their naval name and officer’s stripe. This is presumably from before they got taken over by Banham, after which they switched to the proprietary “shield” shape. • Spotted: High Road, Whetstone, Barnet, London, N20, England, 2011 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Chipping Barnet

Capstan Security


Modern Security Systems, Glasgow, 2012

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“Modern Security Systems” burglar alarm, Glasgow • I always like a Modern alarm – and I’ve never published one in this shape before. • Spotted: Brook Street, Glasgow, G40, Scotland, 2012 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Glasgow Central

Modern Security Systems, ADT

Group 4 Securitas, Lambeth, SE1, 2007

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“Group 4 Securitas” burglar alarm, Lambeth • Same shape as yestarday’s, and the classic 1970s design of Securitas (a name which somehow I always found rather sinister), now bolted onto the aspiring security behemoth that was Group 4. • Spotted: Lower Marsh, Lambeth, London, SE1, England, 2007 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Vauxhall

Group 4 Securitas

Modern Security System, Coventry, 2013

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“Modern Security Systems” burglar alarm, Coventry • Bottle of grog on drunken-looking bell box. • Spotted: towpath, near Coventry Canal Basin, Coventry, Warwickshire, CV1, England, 2013 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Coventry North West

Modern Security Systems

Modern Security Systems

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